Mrs. G was in her 80s and had dementia. Her husband, Mr. G, took great care of her until he started experiencing his own medical problems and he eventually passed away. During her husband’s dying process, Mrs. G’s kids were able to take care of her. However, problems arose when it came to taking care of the finances. Mr. and Mrs. G had a blended family and each parent had two children. All four kids grew up together from a young age.
When both parents’ health started to decline, the kids started taking sides on which parent was more important and how much money should be spent on their individual parent. One child moved in to take care of Mom & Dad and lived in the house for free. Siblings complained that the caregiver-child should be paying rent, but the caregiver said he should be paid for his services and the arguing quickly escalated. Mrs. G’s attorney called and asked if I would consider being the independent trustee to take care of her finances. After I stepped in as trustee, the two children of Mr. G declined to get involved with Mrs. G’s care. Mrs. G’s children took care of her and the trust paid for all of the caregiving costs. After Mrs. G died and all of the children received their distributions, they slowly began to rebuild their family relations.